Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Why Is This Man Smiling?


Mike Nichols, the director, had a read-thru of Charlie Wilson's War. A read-thru is where the cast sits at a large table and reads the script. And you wanted to be a fly on the wall. The cast is surreal. Tom Hanks, Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Julia Roberts. There were emissaries at the gate flagging the celeb vehicles and ushering them to the location. The read thru was catered with fine food, not food from the lot. Large glass vases full of fresh flowers were brought in. There was a cappuccino cart with a server so friendly that I could have asked for a latte and gotten it. There was "foamy" soap in the bathrooms. It's possible I used Hanks foamy soap. I don't know. There wasn't a label specifying who's foamy soap it was but it was gone at the end of the day. I'd like to think it was Hanks foamy soap. I'd like to think I washed my hands with the foamy soap used by Hanks or Hoffman. Either way those guys are incredible actors. Incredible! I heard an extremely credible story that when Hanks did the film "Punchline" he hung out and studied with Seinfeld, Rock, and other comedians for six months. The story goes that, after studying, Hanks stand-up routine was as good as anyone out there. You gotta hand it to an actor with that much passion. (Maybe it's the foamy soap.)

There's a palpable BUZZ surrounding a film this size. Everybody is happy. Who wouldn't want to work on a Mike Nichols film? My office was in the proximity of the read-thru. (Near enough to use the same bathrooms) Here comes the Arron Sorkin part. The production company has a transportation trailer outside the stage. So when you step out onto the Paramount 'street' you have to be careful. I stepped out and was nearly clipped by Sorkin's golfcart. It wasn't Sorkin's fault. It was his assistant. (Those women golf cart drivers, what are you gonna do?) It was a very near miss. I googled "Golf Cart Accidents" and the results aren't pretty. Sorkin was on his cell phone, loudly, and saying something like this" Yeah, yeah, I changed those names. It's not Bimbo One and Bimbo Two" It was much better dialogue than that but I was dwelling on the end flashes of my life. You know, death by golfcart. He was pretty absorbed in the call. They say he's a genius writer. I say he talks loudly on the cell. Loud with articulate authority. Maybe he was late for the read-thru and ordered his assistant to step on it. I'm not saying it will affect how I feel about him one way or another. There's a lot of net buzz about Studio 60. I think I'll give it a TiVo. I know this story is kinda anticlimactic. It would really get some hits if I were dead. So I'll yak a little about Tom Hanks.

I met Hanks on Forrest Gump. We shot the breeze for a few minutes. He was as gentlemen as they get. Everybody says Hanks is a great guy. I thought so when I met him. At the read-thru I spoke to Hanks driver who was one cool dude. Charlie Wilson's War is part of Hanks production company. Maybe Hanks was paying for all the amenities. The driver said that Hanks brings a masseuse (or masseur according to the parlance of our times) in on a regular basis. And a reliable source (I really mean it) says that Hanks buys lotto tickets for the crew once a week. But with the stipulation that if you win you can't quit the movie. And I say, who would want to?

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15 comments:

wcdixon said...

If this picture was taken a couple years ago, I think we'd have a pretty good idea why he's smiling...lol

Scott Stambler said...

oh boy. there were some other photos out there on the ole net. Some stoner site has a bunch of photos of ... that's right; stoned celebs. i don't know if they were advocating drugs or not.

shannon said...

Wow, you're right -- to be a fly on the wall and hear Tom Hanks and Phillip Seymour Hoffman reading an Aaron Sorkin script while guided by Mike Nichols? Holy crappity-crap.

Jules said...

Fun story. I'm choosing to ignore the female driving comment. }:-(

Ballpoint Wren said...

Boy, Portnoy, you sure do get around! Are you retired or still working in Reel Hollywood?

BTW, I'm going to put you into the "Movie People" section of my blogroll. I mean, you're fun and all, but "Fun People" doesn't quite describe your blog as well.

Scott Stambler said...

Bonnie, yup. still working. Nobody knows about the blog. (yet) You think I like the name Portnoy? And anywhere you wanna move me is okay. I can be more fun if you want. When the advance book deal comes can you move me next to Asimov?

Shannon - I would name my blog Fly On The Wall but I don't like the filthy insects. BTW, your writing has been spectacular lately. I'm sorry I've been lame with comments.

Julie - i'm just saying, Asians, old geezers and women golf cart drivers are dangerous. Is that so wrong?

Anonymous said...

A call girl came out saying that a role of a prostitute on The West Wing was based on her after her affair with Sorkin. lol

Janet said...

I dont dislike Julia Roberts, but to me she always fell under the heading o "What's The Big Deal?"

Peg said...

Do give it a Tivo (Studio 60)...I enjoyed it...but perhaps you could give us the scoop on how true to Hollywood life it really is!

It's interesting to me to read your posts Portnoy, because they really seem to capture the reality of "Life on the Lot", as it were, Foamy Soap & all!

Although, if I were a highly respected actor, I'd be embarrassed to request special soaps, snacks, etc. I think I'd just bring my own if I were that selective.

Scott Stambler said...

Peg,

I'm glad the writing conveys a snapshot - because as an anonymous blogger I am filtering a lot. I don't think there's anything quite like this business. The weight of disappointment, rejection, envy and bitterness certainly outmeasures the successful Hollywood story. And to me success equals an individual with some balance in their life. That's not an easy achievement for anyone in any business.

Initially I thought about creating a blog called Bitter Hollywood Stories. But the energy is tough to live with. You write from a very positive and humorous place. Motherhood, Ebay, and family issues that affect the 300 or so blogs that link to you. I would assume your readers are gaining some insight and getting more than 'entertainment.'

Even though I blog about celebrities - I hope the label of 'gossip' isn't firmly attached. On the other hand if that brings the readers that's okay by me. Sorry for such a long response but your comment provoked a stream of thought about who Portnoy is.

BTW - we don't know who brought the foamy soap in. And as far as reel compared to real I am going to create a link box to a bunch of great screenwriter/bloggers that I found from wcdixon's site. They make for good reading on the Hollywood perspective.

Cullen said...

I like the "inside Hollywood" feel of your tales. But the real reason I like popping in to read is to get your perspective on it. That's what's sucked me in.

This film should prove to be fantastic.

Dr. A said...

Congrats on being Blog of the Month!

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